Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Clear as Puddles When Stepped In with Muddy Galoshes

How I envy normal people. People who call radio stations to enter competitions, who fetch their kids from school and eat sugared cereals, people who have real jobs in banks and gyms and law firms. I’ve always felt like I was floating somewhere to the left of them, somehow removed from the forward swooshing of real life. I learned very young to Act As If. Act As If you care what the footy score is. Act As If you’re talking to this man because you’re interested in his theory on why reality TV will never last, when all you’re wondering about is whether he’s a slippery fuck, the kind who seems to leak sperm through his every pore.

I keep questioning whether moving to Australia was some horrible mistake that I should have extricated myself from years ago and am now too far gone to remedy.

And I watched The Apprentice. It must be cool to be as sure of things as Donald Trump appears to be. Clarity, no matter how misguided, must be wonderful.


Blogger Ova Girl said...

brilliant, you crazy writing gal. You are quite right to go public. This snarky goodness must be shared. As soon as I learn how to put my blogfriends in that cunning little list you shall be THERE.

8:39 am  
Blogger fluffy said...

I've been feeling the same way. Wouldn't it be great if things were simple and all this analysing and outsidering would just go *poof*. Then we could be one of the girls and have a regular tennis date and bring dry crackers and carrots in a tupperware container AND THEY WOULD SATISFY US and we would wash our unstained whites in bio-ad after.

Did I mention we would wear the tennis sock with white bobbles and they would slip down into our shoes?

9:00 am  

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