Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Lard, cheap lard for sale...

And in the midst of being swept away in relief and joy, I realise there is the small matter of me being hugely overpregnant. I say overpregnant because, although I am only 24 weeks, the doctor is measuring me at 33 weeks. It’s quite normal for twins, he assures me. My body disagrees. There’s nothing normal about the fact that, for once, my arse is not my biggest appendage. Also I have a spot of gestational diabetes. Probably more a large splatter than a spot. This is common amongst twin pregnancies. And fat Eastern European Jews. And members of my family. So it’s not like I wasn’t expecting it. But it means I have to prick myself four times a day to check my blood. And I have to avoid most carbohydrates, tropical fruit and men with moustaches. Will you think me sick if I admit I actually enjoy checking my blood? There’s something quite satisfying about seeing the effects that food has on my body. R and I now have a tipping competition where we each guess what my blood will be. The closest gets to eat a diabetic lolly. God we know how to party.

The Type A competitive elements of my personality also enjoy the fact that I’m constantly putting myself to the test. At this stage of the pregnancy I’m mostly passing. Any blood glucose reading between 4 and 7 is acceptable. I feel good about fives, but slightly nervous about sixes. When O was in hospital I had one or two nines. I was astounded at the impact stress has on blood glucose levels. I did a few little tests where I’d eat nothing, ask R to give me a big fright, then test my blood. Once, it got to ten with two frights and no food. Fuck, my body’s dumb. If only I could trick it into making me thin, we might have a working relationship.

Phwyoooo! Feels great to return to my old neuroses and plague myself with something other than tethered cords and the impact of morphine on an infant.


Blogger Ova Girl said...

Diabetic lollies? Woo hoo! Party at your place!

9:54 pm  
Blogger surly girl said...

i've only just caught up. yay for o!! bless her little heart - i can't imagine what a relief that must be.

you need to take care of you as well tho. have a lolly and get some sleep!

10:07 pm  
Blogger Stacey said...

So glad the surgery went well for O. May she only get better and better. I have my glucose screening sometime in the next few days. With the amounts of sugar I have been consuming, I do wonder how I will measure up!

11:15 pm  
Blogger Kyahgirl said...

Wow, diabetic lollies! Rock on yidchick!

2:27 am  
Blogger Urban Chick said...

gosh, you're so much more rocknroll than i was during my pregnancy

*lower lip quivers with envy*

6:27 am  
Blogger LJ said...

No SUGAR? None?
There is no justice.
You should be allowed to have sugar and it should act as a health food.
You deserve at least that much after all this.
Who's running this show, anyway? I have a few suggestions.

10:06 am  
Blogger Lin said...

YC, You're just having too much excitement in your life. Why is it that other people's pregnancies progress SO quickly???

10:44 am  

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